Live. Now.

It's indescribable, suddenly losing your partner and best friend. Your (almost literal) other half. You need to completely re-learn how to live, alone. Almost every facet of your future as you saw it will be different. I could go on and on, but in short, it's emotionally... which sometimes leads to physically... overwhelming. Exhausting.

Luckily I'm wired the way that I am.

Make no mistake, I have certainly taken my healthy share of time sitting, depressed, down on my life and hating everyone living their own happy version of theirs. Some days anxiety takes over my whole being. I cry often.

When I finally manage to pull out of it, I realize that... sometimes things just happen. And it's nobody's fault. The cosmos just aligns in such a way to cause shit to happen. It happens every day all over the world, and that's life.

So Live. Now.

I think of the life we led, and I find comfort. We Lived. We spent time together doing everything we possibly could, in amongst the business of life. We travelled, we ate and drank, we cooked together, parented, worked, cleaned, built... We embraced, touched, made love... We were transparent. We listened. We responded. We cared for each other.

I'm struck, in her passing, how many people have told me that our love inspired them to love their partner differently. If this is true, knowing what we had, I am (we are) honored.

"We loved with a love that was more than love"

-Edgar Allen Poe